Brent and I went to the NICU Monday at lunchtime, fully expecting to sign some papers and take our baby home with us. We received word, however, that Haley failed her scan. According to the report that was faxed to the doctor, Haley's oxygen levels dropped while she slept and it was cause enough to put her on a monitor, which required us to stay the night at the hospital with her and go through some training.
I have to admit, it was a pretty deflating moment. No one anticipated any hang ups and everyone thought we'd be out by Monday night. I'm not convinced the scan was done right - but that's just me being a tish bitter. It was a different feeling in the room as we went through training on the monitor and talking about what we needed to get from home before heading back to the hospital for the night. I tried not to get upset about it - but trying only got me so far. I was still upset. For days I had been preparing for Monday being the big day. And then it wasn't. It sucked.
Brent and I settled in to our hospital room which happened to be the same room I stayed in when I was admitted nearly five weeks ago. That was weird, but comforting at the same time. This time, our baby was in there with us. (Yay for that!)
I didn't go to sleep when I first got tired - which was a mistake. I stayed up for Haley's midnight feeding and didn't get to bed until about 1:00. 3:00 I slept through my phone alarm, but Brent got up and got Haley's bottle from the nurse. I woke up at 6 and Brent fed Haley again while I pumped. Then we gathered all our things, and got ourselves ready to go.
We had been told the night before that we could leave whenever we wanted in the morning. Come to find out, however, that was not the case. We left 3 1/2 hours after I wanted to leave, and I was getting frustrated. But - whatever - I still got to go home with my baby! Looking at her, listening to her, cuddling with her - all of that melted away my frustrations.
On the car-ride home, I sat in the back seat with Haley. I was nervous...and overly-aware of every pothole, crack, or disturbance of the street. I think Brent was a little nervous too, but I doubt he'll say so. We were a little snippy to each other in the car. Just a little, though. We came home and it was kind of like, "Ok! Now what?" We all took turns sleeping, and I had to go to my 2nd post-op appointment. It was strange turning right at the elevator to go to the clinic instead of left to go to the NICU. (I'm just about golden, by the way - everything checks out health-wise for me!)
The first night with Haley here at home was exciting. Every grunt, groan, or squeak she made, I was up and peering over the side of the bassinet to make sure she was ok. I think four, out of the 2308570437250 times I got up, she needed her pacifier. Every other time, it was simply a noise and nothing more. Brent fed her at midnight, and I fed her at 3:00 and 6:00 a.m. Haley decided to be wide awake and super cute between 3:00 and 4:30. Brent woke at one point and said, "Is she fussy?" "No....she just has a lot to tell us." And I hung on every squeak. She definitely has a captive audience. I would be more captive if it were not between 3 and 5 a.m., however.
I had told Brent the night before that I wanted to be up and showered before he headed to work. About forty minutes before he was supposed to leave for work he woke me up and said, "Do you want to get up and shower?" "mmmpfh!" I replied, which translated to, "No, please just let me sleep for the next ten years." I put Haley next to me in bed (don't tell on me, because I know we're not supposed to do that) and Brent caught a picture. We slept that way until she woke me up to let me know it was time to feed her again. Right on schedule - she is a particular one, this little Haley!
I changed her diaper and fed her and she was wide awake again, so I listened to her tell me all about the mysteries of life while The Bonnie Hunt show was on the t.v. When she fell back asleep I put her in the bassinet, grabbed a baby monitor, and headed downstairs to do some laundry. Those baby monitors are wonderful investments. Thank you to the people who gave us ours!! (By the way, thank you cards will be on their way for every gift we've received....it's just been tricky sitting down to write them out and get them in the mail. Your gift has not gone unnoticed or unappreciated - I promise!)
Hubs came home shortly after noon. He napped with his daughter and I ate lunch, took a shower (finally) and got ready for a different follow up appointment. So many of those this week! Once again Brent and I barely, only slightly, got snippy with each other. I think if I had gotten a nap, it wouldn't have happened. We headed off and I noticed - when I have a baby to worry about in my backseat, my road rage totally disappears. I was so focused and so determined on our drive, I didn't say one harsh thing about another person's lack of driving abilities. Wow!
We had some company tonight for a little bit - one couple came by to bring Haley a gift and another friend stopped by to pick up an item she had left here. Last night we had two people stop by to bring us dinner. So Haley has had a few visitors already! And she has been a gracious hostess. Last night she peed all over herself in front of one guest, soaked her mama with breastmilk in front of another, and tonight she did her cute little cry for our friend L. The entertainment is just invaluable.
So here we are - home, and loving it. This little girl may have turned our lives upside-down....twice....but I don't think Brent or I would have it any other way. Now if we could just get past the snippyness - nothing a bazillion more naps won't cure.
Please continue to pray that Haley can continue to grow and gain weight (she was 4lbs 8.2 oz today!!), and that Brent and I would have the wisdom and resources to be the parents God has called us to be. Please also continue to pray for our dear friends who went in to preterm labor with twins - so far the labor has been postponed and the twins are healthy - praise God on both those counts! Those babies need to stay in their mom for quite some time yet, so your prayers for all involved in that situation are well worth the moments you spend saying them!